Safe Coping Skills

I have mentioned before that I am attending classes at the Mental Health Association of Greensboro, one of the classes right now is on safe coping skills.  I am going to list here ones that we were provided today in class.  I have highlighted the ones that seemed important and stuck out to me.

1. Ask for help~Reach out to someone safe
2. Inspire Yourself~Carry something positive (poem), or negative (photo of a friend who overdosed)
3. Leave a Bad scene~When things go wrong, get out
4. Persist~never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never, never give up
5. Honesty~Secrets and lying are at the core of PTSD and substance abuse; honesty heals them
6. Cry~Let yourself cry; it will not last forever
7. Choose self-respect~Choose whatever will make you like yourself tomorrow
8. Take Good care of your body~eat right, exercise, sleep, safe sex
9. List your Options~In any situation, you have choices
10. Create Meaning~Remind yourself what you are living for:  your children? love? truth? justice? God?
11. Do The Best you can with what you have~Make the most of available opportunities
12. Set a Boundary~Say "No" to protect yourself
13. Compassion~Listen to yourself with respect and Care
14. When in doubt, do what's hardest~The most difficult path is invariably the right one
15. Talk yourself through it~self talk helps in difficult times
16. Imagine~Create a mental picture that helps you feel different (remember a safe place)
17. Notice the choice point~In slow motion, notice the exact moment when you chose a substance
18. Pace Yourself~If overwhelmed, go slower; if stagnant, go faster
19. Stay Safe~Do whatever you need to do to put your safety above all
20. Seek Understanding, not blame~Listen to your behavior; blaming prevents growth
21. If one way doesn't work, try another~As if in a maze, turn a corner and try a new path
22. Link PTSD and substance abuse~recognize substances as an attempt to self-medicate
23. Alone is better than a bad relationship~If only treaters are safe for now, that's ok
24. Create a new story~You are the author of your life; be the hero who overcomes adversity
25.  Avoid Avoidable Suffering~Prevent bad situations in advance
26. Ask Others~Ask others if your belief is accurate
27. Get Organized~You'll feel more in control with lists, "to-do's" and a clean house
28. Watch for Danger Signs~Face a problem before it becomes huge; notice red flags
29. Healing Above All~Focus on what matters
30. Try something, Anything~A good plan today is better than a perfect one tomorrow
31. Discovery~Find out whether your assumption is true rather that staying "in your head"
32. Attend Treatment~A.A., self-help, therapy, medications, groups~anything that keeps you going.
33. Create a buffer~Put something between you and danger (time, distance)
34. Say what you really think~You'll feel closer to others (but only do this with safe people)
35. Listen to your needs~No more neglect-really hear what you need
36. Move Toward your Opposite~(example: if you are too dependant, try being more independent
37. Replay the scene~Review a negative event: what can you do differently next time?
38. Notice the cost~What is the price of substance abuse in your life?
39. Structure your day~a productive schedule keeps you on track and connected to the world
40. Set an action plan~Be specific, set a deadline, and let others know about it
41. Protect Yourself~Put up a shield against destructive people, bad environments, and substances
42. Soothing Talk~Talk to yourself very gently (as if to a friend or small child)
43. Think of the consequences~Really see the impact for tomorrow, next week, next year
44. Trust the process~Just keep moving forward; the only way out is through
45. Work the material~The more you practice and participate, the quicker the healing
46. Integrate the split self~Accept all sides of yourself; they are there for a reason
47. Expect growth to feel uncomfortable~if it feels awkward or difficult you're doing it right
48. Replace destructive activities~Eat candy instead of getting high
49. Pretend you like yourself~see how different the day feels
50. Focus on Now~Do what you can to make today better; don't get overwhelmed by the past or future
51. Praise Yourself~Notice what you did right; this is the most powerful method of growth
52. Observe repeating patterns~Try to notice and understand your re-enactments
53. Self-nurture~Do something you enjoy
54. Practice Delay~If you can't totally prevent a self destructive act, at least delay it as long as possible
55. Let Go of Destructive relationships~If it can't be fixed, detach
56. Take Responsibility~Take an active, not a passive approach
57. Set a deadline~Make it happen by setting a date
58. Make a commitment~Promise yourself to do what's right to help your recovery
59. Rethink~Think in a way that helps you feel better
60. Detach from emotional pain (grounding)~Distract, walk away, change the channel
61. Learn from experience~Seek wisdom that can help you next time
62. Solve the problem~Don't take it personally when things go wrong~try to just seek a solution
63. Use kinder language~Make your language less harsh
64. Examine the evidence~Evaluate both sides of the picture
65. Plan it out~Take the time to think ahead-it's the opposite of impulsivity
66. Identify the belief~For example, shoulds, deprivation reasoning
67. Reward Yourself~Find a healthy way to celebrate anything you do right
68. Create new "tapes"~Literally! Take a tape recorder and record a new way of thinking to play back
69. Find rules to live by~Remember a phrase that works for you (ex:stay real)
70. Setbacks are not failures~a setback is just a setback, nothing more
71. Tolerate the feeling~"No feeling is final", just get through it safely
72. Actions first and feelings will follow~Don't wait until you feel motivated; just start now
73. Create positive addictions~sports, hobbies, AA
74. When in doubt, don't~If you suspect danger, stay away
75. Fight the trigger~Take an active approach to protect yourself
76. Notice the source~Before you accept criticism or advice, notice who's telling it to you
77. Make a decision~If you're stuck, try choosing the best solution you can right now; don't wait
78. Do the right thing~Do what you know will help you, even if you don't feel like it
79. Go to a meeting~Feet first; just get there and let the rest happen
80. Protect your body from HIV~This is truly a life or death issue
81. Prioritize healing~Make healing your most urgent and important goal, above all else
82. Reach for Community Resources~Lean on them!  They can be a source of great support
83. Get others to support your recovery~Tell People what you need
84. Notice what you can control~List the aspects of your life you do control (ex:job, friends)