Saturday, December 29, 2012

No More Resolutions

Last year I gave up New Years Resolutions.  Instead I chose to do One Word.  I saw great growth doing this.  So this year I am going to do the same thing.  For more information on my One Word for 2013, please visit my other blog http://thepuresacrifice.blogspot.com/2012/12/one-word-2013.html.


Thursday, December 27, 2012

Progress Report

Sorry I have been spending more of my time lately away from the computer with the holidays and all.  But I did want to say that I have not forgotten you.

I am also going to be spending the next few days trying to finish cleaning my room.  My goal is to be finished by January 1st.  I am making great progress.

I hope that everyone had a Merry Christmas and that everyone has a Happy New Year.

Monday, December 17, 2012

My Thoughts on Sandy Hook Tragedy

For my thoughts on Sandy Hook, please visit my other blog.  http://thepuresacrifice.blogspot.com/2012/12/one-step-away-from-evil.html

Meaning of the Christmas Tree


Green is the second color of Christmas.  The stately evergreen, with its unchanging color represents the hope of eternal life in Jesus.  It's needles point heavenward as a reminder that mankind's thoughts should turn heavenward as well.

The star was the heavenly sign of promise.  God promised a Savior for the world and the star was the sign of the fulfillment of that promise on the night that Jesus Christ was born.  God always fulfills his promises and, wise men still seek him.

Red is the first color of Christmas.  Red is deep, intense, vivid.  It is the color of the life-giving blood that flows through our veins.  It is the symbol of God's greatest gift.  Christ gave His life and shed His blood for us that we might have eternal life. When we see the color red, it should remind us of the most wonderful gift.

Just as lost sheep are guided to safety by the sound of the bell, it continues to ring today for all to be guided to the fold.

The glow of the candle represents how people can show their thanks for the gift of God's Son that Christmas Eve long ago.

Twinkling lights symbolize, each one representing one of God's precious children, their light shining for all to see.  Let your light so shine before people that all may see it and glorify God.

The Candy cane is a stick of hard white candy: white to symbolize the virgin birth and sinless nature of Jesus, and hard to symbolize the Solid Rock the foundation of the church, and the firmness of God's promises.  The candy cane is in the form of a "J" to represent the precious name of Jesus, who came to earth.  It also represents the Good Shepard's crook, which he uses to reach down into the ditches of the world to lift out the fallen lambs who, like all sheep, have gone astray.  The original candy cane had three small red stripes, which are the stripes of the scourging Jesus received by which we are healed, and a large red stripe that represents the shed blood of Jesus, so that we can have the promise of eternal life.

Wreath made of fresh, fragrant greenery tied with a bright red bow.  The bow reminds us of the bond of perfection, which is love.  The wreath embodies all the good things about Christmas for those with eyes to see and hearts to understand.  It contains the colors of red and green and the heaven-turned needles of the evergreen.  The bow tells the story of good will towards all and it's color reminds us of Christ's sacrifice.  Even it's shape is symbolic, representing eternity and the eternal nature of Christ's love.  It is a circle, without beginning and without end.




Thursday, December 13, 2012

The Tradition of the Pretzel



Pretzels began in the 6th century at an Italian monastery.  A Monk was preparing unleavened bread for Lent and twisted the scraps of bread dough to resemble arms in prayer.  He named his creation Pretiola, a word meaning little reward, and gave it as a treat to the children who recited their prayers.



Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Making Progress

I believe that I mentioned that this month I was making it my goal to work on my room.  I have made great progress.  Oh there is still plenty to be done.  But I am so incredibly impressed with the progress that I have made recently.

Just to show you what I mean 2 samples:
 
The stack in the beginning

Didn't flip this one, but the stack after doing some work awhile back

 
What is left from that stack after working in there lately.  Most of which I hope to have a home for soon.  I just need to go through some of it and then assign it a home.  The rest of the room is also improving greatly.

Also 1 week Soda free!!!!

Monday, December 10, 2012

The Holly Wreath


The holly wreath symbolizes the crown of thorns worn by Jesus at Calvary.

Its red berries represent the blood He shed for the forgiveness of our sins.

The endless circle is eternal life obtained through Him.



Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Realizations

So last night/early this morning while trying to get to sleep I was thinking/praying/reflecting and I realized 2 things.  One thing is that I am making small progress working on cleaning up my room each day, and I will be able to finish it!!!!  My room is a total disaster area and has frustrated me to no end for a long time now.  I have just recently begun working on it to get anything accomplished.

The other may sound simple to you, but for me it was huge, and this is that my desire to move and cut the family off is diminishing.  Those that have read this for any length of time know that my relationship with my mom is rocky at best and I can't remember but I may have mentioned here before that my biggest desire was to be able  to move and get my own place.  I usually followed that up with saying that I would be cutting off all contact with my family for my own self preservation.  I realized that the urge to do that is much less these days.  In fact, I'm beginning to wonder whether that would be as beneficial to me as I once thought it would.

Monday, December 3, 2012

The Legend of the Poinsettia



On Christmas Eve a small child had no gifts to give the Baby Jesus.  When she prayed an angel appeared and said, "Whatever you give from your heart will make Jesus happy."  So the girl picked some weeds and as she took them to church they changed into a brilliant red bouquet of poinsettia flowers.


Saturday, December 1, 2012

Christmas Season

There is so much to the Christmas season.  Shopping, family gatherings, music and movies.  Sometimes it can weigh heavy on a person, and I have honestly spent many Christmases kind of down in the dumps.  I hope that this year will be different.  But in the past I would get disgusted at Christmas time because I would look  at my life, and feel like it wasn't where it should be.  I am 34, still single and no kids.  This was not how I pictured life.  In fact, I thought I would have been married and at least have had someone I loved to spend the holidays with.  That has not been the case.

But more and more I am looking at what I do have to be thankful for and the real reason for Christmas.  I am hoping that intentional focus this year, and the fact that depression isn't prominent, will keep me from not enjoying my holiday.

Friday, November 30, 2012

E-books and Life

This has been a crazy week and I have not gotten to work on my story, but to be honest I have lost some of my motivation.  I am thinking it is because I have pushed for 25 days writing all the time and I hope that a break will cure the lack of motivation.

As we go into this Christmas Season I hope to have some good Christmas posts for you.  I know that in the past I have tried to keep my faith as a minimal part of this blog and save all that for my other blog.  But that is hard because you can't compartmentalize your life.  So that will no longer be the case.  I will save the deeper digging into scripture for my other blog.  But you will see some of that here as well.

I received my Nook simpletouch in the mail this week.  I am so in love!!!  I have also been looking for places to get free e-books.  At some point I will add a page of these links to my blog.  But for now here are a few of the ones I have found.  Of course Barnes & Nobles has lots of free books.


Vessel Project
Scribd
Ebook
Many Books



Monday, November 26, 2012

December Goals

I have made up my mind about my priorities for December, and have set some goals.  You may have noticed that I added a ticker to the left hand column.  That is because I decided that I would for one of my goals for December is to give up soft drinks.  I have heard that this is a great way to take off weight, which is just an added benefit.  So I am going to track my weight loss as I do this.

My other goals for December are:

  • Clean My Room
  • Get Out My Computer
  • Find A Job
  • Finish Writing my Story
  • And cut out soft drinks (and most of my caffeine)
In dropping soft drinks, I am not going  to refuse them completely, but I will save them for a treat, like if I go out to eat.  But drinking them all day every day at home, I am going to quit.  My drink of choice is Mello Yellow, one 12-ounce drink is 180 calories.  I usually drink 6-8 drinks a day.....that is 1080-1440 calories a day.

I would love to have some of you join me in dropping a bad habit this month.  If you would like to join me leave me a message.  


Saturday, November 24, 2012

Current Projects.

I haven't formed a schedule for posting for this blog because NaNoWriMo has kept me crazy busy.  But I have decided I will start posting all my writing stuff on this blog, as well as thoughts on what I am reading and  my crochet projects.

So right now I am between a few different books, but not actively reading any at the moment.  Pinterest was a major source of inspiration and recreation, but November has found me straying from that because I have been spending most free time writing.  I look forward to getting back to pinning soon.

I am currently involved in two different online bible studies, and I am enjoying both.  One is an advent study that starts back on Sunday, using the SOAP method.  The other is a "So That" study with Wendy Blight.

I was increasing my time crocheting prior to November.  I even found a great website.  Ravelry which has lots of great patterns and forums to explore.  My current project is a wrap with slits.


Only I am doing it in Magenta.  

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Happy Thanksgiving




Since tomorrow is Thanksgiving there will be no blog post.  But I did want to take the chance to wish each of you a Happy Thanksgiving.  Can I make a recommendation?  Do something different this year, perhaps invite someone different to dinner, or carry dinner to someone who will be alone, or maybe just spend some time alone, a bit longer tomorrow with God thanking Him for all that you have, and the many blessings that you have been given.

We should have gratitude daily, and while I try my best, I am sure that many can relate to the fact that sometimes it is easy to get caught up in all the bustle of life and forget.  So tomorrow I am making a renewed effort to be aware of the blessings, of each and every person, even the difficult ones, as I celebrate with some of my family.  There are many who chose to do individual family dinners instead.  I don't begrudge them that.  But I will be thankful for each one that shows and the fact that we get the chance to celebrate together.

May we also use this time to pray for those who do not have the relationships with God that we do.  That God would draw them to Him, and turn their lives around.

Enjoy a blessed and Happy Thanksgiving!!!


Editing your Novel


For those like me who have never heard of it............there is a National Novel Editing Month!!

It takes place in March.



Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Finished NaNoWriMo

I did it!!!  I finished with my 50000 word count goal before the November 30 at midnight deadline.  I am so excited!!

That said however I have not finished my story.  I will continue to work on it through the month of November.  Then next month I will decide whether to keep writing or start editing.

Characters in my story

I realized today that I have talked often about my story and writing it.  But I have not told you the first thing about it.  I think that is partly because I was going by the seat of my pants and didn't pre-plan the story out.  But today I want to correct that, at least partially.

The story starts with my main character~
A 25 year old female, trying to escape from her abusive husband who has lots of friends in high places, so she must be extremely careful not to get caught.

A 30-year old young man, who is rejected by society, an orphan, his teenage history of being a problem child precedes him, society accuses him of being trouble and committing crimes, leaving society he sets out on his own.

A 15 year old autistic boy, who wakes to hear his parents shot, barely escapes into the woods behind his house.

A 6 year old, African American child, who was found tied to a log in the forest, leg pinned under a log, badly beaten and abused.

All the characters are on a journey to find freedom, peace, acceptance, and understanding, and possibly themselves.

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Links to dictionaries, glossaries, thesauri and word lists

Links to dictionaries, glossaries, thesauri and word lists

Found these on the NaNo Forums, but thought I would share

Your Dictionary (If you visit this page, you’ll also find links to glossaries, foreign language dictionaries and industry specific dictionaries.)

OneLook (Go to this page for a list of dictionaries and glossaries that OneLook indexes.)

alphaDictionary (You can find a huge dictionary/grammar directory here. Specialty dictionary links are available here.)

Visuwords (Visual dictionary/thesaurus.)

Snappy Words (Very similar to Visuwords.)

Lexipedia (Its fuzzynyms are particularly interesting.)

Thesauri on-line (By subject field and by language.)

The Bookshelf Muse (Descriptive words in several categories. If you only visit one site from this list, make it this one.)

Personality Traits, Character traits, Human Traits

The Word Savvy Site - Tip Sheets

Over 101 Words That Describe Food

A to Z of Positive Words

Complimentary Adjectives

Unusual and Weird Words

List of Common Abstract Nouns

Compound Word Lists Complete

English slang and colloquialisms of the UK

Index of Common Phrases

A-Z List of Phrasal Verbs

Free English idioms, idiomatic expressions, proverbs and sayings

IdiomSite.com - Find out the meanings of common sayings

English Idioms & Idiomatic Expressions

Idioms of American English

Index of Metaphor Lists

101 Best Similes in Literature

Striking Similes

Creating Characters online

Copied from Forums:

Want an image of your character to look at to keep your descriptions somewhat consistent, but can’t draw or get an artist to draw a picture for you? Luckily there’s a lot of free online avatar makers you can use as a placeholder.

Gaia Dream Avatar Maker. Very cartoony (most of them are cartoony, but this one even more so), but a whole lot of options. Also one of the better choices for fantasy characters, as they’ve got a lot of fantastical clothing options.

Crysandrea Dream Avatar Maker. More realistic than Gaia though still anime-esque. Less clothing options, but more color choices for each item. Great for making humanoid fantasy monsters, or normal people.

Dream Selfy. Fun because it’s animated. Very much chibi. Loads of options, though can be difficult to sort though.

Digibody’s Caricature Maker. Not the prettiest results, but if you’ve got a character that isn’t anime-attractive all the time, this can help you define their face shape and proportions.

Meez Avatar Maker. It’s 3D!~ A fair amount of options. Note you don’t actually have to sign up to use the maker, but you won’t be able to save the avatar so you’ll have to take a screenshot. You’ll have to do that either way, actually…

If your character looks like a human, you can do a search for “PBs” (played-bys) on InsaneJournal. There are a lot of icon makers for journal-based role-playing on IJ, and some categorize by nationality, age, gender, hair color, etc. It can be very useful. And not all of the faces are “celebrities” either.

eLouai’s Candybar doll makers
http://elouai.com/candybar5/newroot.php

It’s a more realistic anime-style than Gaia or Crysandrea, along with stupid amounts of clothes and hair styles. A good thing to note is that, out of the 3000ish hair styles, only 1000ish of them show up if you sort by color. Have fun.

Blog Posts on Writing

7 habits of highly prolific writers

Procrastination Station

Title Scorer

Story Analyzer  For after November when you are ready to edit.

NaNo Progress

Hey. Haven’t posted lately, mostly because I have spent all my time working on my story. The story continues to develop nicely. Although I do know I will need to edit and add some things and fine tune them next month. I will also need to finish it. :)




Wednesday, November 7, 2012

NaNoWriMo Progress

I am so excited.  I have written 17,571 words in the last 7 days.  This is amazing when I didn't think that I would even get 1500 words.

I can be creative and write.  : )

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Better-Than-Almost-Anything Cake


A few years ago I found a recipe on the bake of a cake mix box, that sounded interesting.  So I decided to give it a try.  It turned out to become my favorite cake to eat, and make to take somewhere.  There is never any left.  A great success.  So I thought I would share.

 
Better-Than-Almost-Anything Cake
 
 
 1     box Betty Crocker® SuperMoist® German chocolate cake mix
        Water, vegetable oil and eggs called for on cake mix box
1      can (14 oz) sweetened condensed milk
1      jar (16 to 17 oz) caramel, butterscotch or fudge topping
1      container (8 oz) frozen whipped topping, thawed
1      bag (8 oz) toffee chips or bits 
 
 
 
Directions
1.   Heat oven to 350°F (325°F for dark or nonstick pan). Make and bake cake as directed on box for 13x9-inch pan. Cool 15 minutes.

2.   Poke top of warm cake every 1/2 inch with handle end of wooden spoon. Drizzle condensed milk evenly over top of cake; let stand until milk has been absorbed into cake. Drizzle with caramel topping. Run knife around sides of pan to loosen cake. Cover and refrigerate about 2 hours or until chilled.

3.   Spread whipped topping over top of cake. Sprinkle with toffee bits. Store covered in refrigerator.


I hope that you enjoy as much as I do.

Friday, November 2, 2012

Thursday, November 1, 2012

National Novel Writing Month

Remember the Author I mentioned in my last post....God is still using her.  She mentioned the other day on facebook and twitter that she wanted to go back to writing novels.  I really was not happy with this, in fact I am ready to stop following her because God keeps using her to prick at me.

I have heard so much talk about November being National Novel Writing Month, and with that comes NaNoWriMo.  I have been ignoring such talk, as I don't consider myself a writer.

Oddly enough I found myself looking at the website for this.  You have to write 50,000 words in 30 days!!  What!?  Are you crazy?  I am not doing this!!

Then 2 days prior to November 1st, I find myself registering for an account, just because I haven't been able to totally dismiss this notion.  Still no intentions of going through with it.  Yesterday found me creating the main character, and developing the beginning scene.  And today, so far I have thought of more of the journey and some additional characters, although I haven't sat down to write for the day yet.

I may indeed be crazy....but I feel God nudging me towards trying this, even if I can't keep up and don't get the word count, just as a growth process.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Change possible on the Horizon?

So in the last few weeks someone started following me on twitter.  Not sure how this person, an author, found me or why they chose to follow me...but oddly they did.  So I decided after a few tweets to check out this persons blog.  Amazing person, lots of great things to say.  I'm good with that, I even venture out and comment on the blog and on the tweets.  No big deal, right?  This sweet person starts talking back.  Even better since I love to talk.

So I go about my routine as normal, I mean on twitter, you are going to have followers, and it doesn't matter if someone follows you that much, what are the chances that it would change anything you write.  It hasn't changed what I write.  But some of the blog posts, and links, well they got me to thinking....and I'm starting to feel nudges.  I don't always pay attention to nudges and I am quick to dismiss them.  But sometimes you can kind of feel the air shift around you, and you can tell things in your life are going to shift.

Have I mentioned that I hate change!!!  That said, I haven't been able to brush off the nudge or the sense that God is lining things up to make changes in my life.  Now I guess this would be the place to mention that I have recently asked God where He would use me.  And I have asked my Pastor, at the church I just recently returned to, to also pray that God would show me where I should serve.  Been seeking my area to be of help to Gods kingdom.  Been reading some life changing books and just really doing some soul searching.

In spite of all of this, I guess you could say I wasn't totally expecting any major shifts all that soon.  So going about somewhat like normal although starting some new habits.  So the author I mentioned, she sometimes shares posts about writing, and well I have been doing an online bible study where there is a blog hop, and I have shared my other blog on there and have been thinking about the blog and researched a bit how to make a bigger difference.  So I have somewhat focused on writing content and stuff.

My old therapist had recommended that I follow through with an idea someone gave me in an online community to write something that for now I will not name, using my faith to help others with mental health concerns.  Well I had been thinking I would, but have not taken the time to attempt any of this yet, although I have some ideas.

Now reading some of the things on the authors blog, and the writing tips and things.  I am getting this strange feeling that I can't shake, that God has brought this person into my online life right now for a reason.  But more than that I find that I think God is about to change my life.  I keep reminding myself and God that if it is His will that I will do this, even though it might be uncomfortable for me.  At the same time, I like my little life, fairly simple and uncomplicated.  I refuse to over think things and make it into something it is not, however, I don't offer myself the chance to totally ignore these feelings.  I find that God has a strange sense of humor, and the things you had never seriously considered or ever thought about doing, sometimes they are the very things that happen.

At the same time, I will not forge ahead and attempt to do anything on my own.  I don't want to attempt to force things before the time is right, and I don't want to push things along anyway.  I hate change, but I have found when God is behind it, then it is almost always worth while to obey.

And trying to convince myself last night that I was over thinking and it was nothing at all, I picked up the bible to continue my reading, and what verse stuck out and seriously reinforced everything?

Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying: “Whom shall I send, And who will go for Us?” Then I said, “Here am I! Send me.”  Isaiah 6:8
I know this is considered somewhat a new christian idea to think that you pick up the bible, flip somewhere and find a verse that is meant for you.  But honestly I wasn't looking for a verse, or anything, just continuing in my reading of Isaiah. But that just really stuck out, and couldn't be denied.

So what do I expect to happen, absolutely nothing.  And what do I expect from this sweet writer, nothing.  But I will not be surprised if God doesn't use these experiences in a really big way in the days to come.  What do I mean about a big way?  Only God knows what that means.

Blog Purpose Redefined

I have written on various things on this blog...it was supposed to pertain to my struggles with mental health concerns and life struggles in general.  But like all things in life, I find that I can't compartmentalize this as being separate from my faith, and so struggles have also been post on my other blog with my sharing the Christian faith with others.

I find that the name of this blog is versatile and allows for me to change topics frequently which will help now as I redefine things.  I am thinking that this blog will take a turn, and while still encompassing mental health concerns of mine it will also encompass my creative side.

I am going to include here, thoughts on books I am reading, stuff related to Crocheting, and recipes that we try and like.  And maybe some health stuff.

For now I will work on redecorating and then I will try to figure out a type of schedule for posting more regularly.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Time for recreation

My other blog has really worked better for me, than this one has.  I think part of that is because I have given it more time and attention.  I also think because it combines my faith with my life I have had more to write about there.  I simply don't spend a lot of time thinking overly much about my mental health these days.

That said I think I need to give this blog a little more love.  So I am thinking a redecorating is in order.  Also maybe a serious considering of what I would write about with more regularity.  I mean it may still be about my areas of struggle, but maybe combined with my hobbies, recipes, books I am reading.  But at this point I am not sure.

I am going to brainstorm on this and I will post some ideas soon.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Am I really being Judged?

One of the things I really hate about Borderline Personality Disorder and Social Anxiety is the fact that you often feel that people are judging you, whether they really are or not.  This can be really problematic, especially if like me, you are a people pleaser.  Because in your own distorted perceptions you may feel people are judging you and you don't feel like you measure up.

However in reality, things may be very different.  No one may be judging you at all.  But because it is in your mind that others are judging you....you start behaving as though they are and you began to act as though they can't be trusted.

This can be very confusing for someone, when they don't know the battle going on in your mind.  I haven't learned (I don't think) the skills for dealing with this yet, and if I have, I am not aware of it.  It makes for a pretty conflicting time.

I know so little about BPD and how that really interacts with my other problems.  But I can remember this bit from the description and for now I know that it is not just the social anxiety as I had thought in the past.

Monday, October 1, 2012

Typical BPD, Maybe

So I have belonged to this one website since 2009, and I have recently come to decide that it is time for me to leave it.  This is a hard decision for me because I have invested much time getting to know others and offer support to others, yet I feel when I occasionally reach out, it is not reciprocated.

Now granted I get that it is BPD to get mad about perceived or real rejection, so it could be the BPD talking....at the same time I feel that I am no longer in the same frame of mind that I was in when I went to that site.  So I am hoping that I can successfully walk away from the site this time.

I have taken short breaks before but never been able to make it last.  But this time I hope for it to be different.  I am simply looking to make my life more about the things it should be focused on and less about websites and supposed online friends, with people that I don't really know.

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Distress Tolerance Skills-Self Soothe

Self-Soothe

A way to remember these skills is to think of calming your five senses.

With Vision:  Buy one beautiful flower; set a pretty place at the table; look at nature around you; look at the stars; fix your nails so they look pretty; look at beautiful pictures in a book; be mindful of each sight that passes before you.

With Hearing:  Listen to soothing music or to exciting music; pay attention to sounds of nature such as birds, crickets, rainfall, the wind through the trees.  Sing to your favorite songs or hum a calming tune.  Be mindful of any sound that comes your way, letting each one go in one ear and then out the other.

With Smell:  Use your favorite perfume or lotion.  Boil cinnamon; bake cookies, cake or bread (anything that smells good when you bake it).  Smell flowers

With Taste:  Have a really good meal and eat it slowly.  Drink a favorite soothing drink (no alcohol or caffeine).  Eat a tasty dessert.  Really taste the food you eat or drink; eat one thing mindfully.

With Touch:  Take a bubble bath; put clean sheets on the bed.  Pet your dog or cat; have a massage or soak your feet.  Sink into a really comfortable chair in your home.  Hug someone; notice one-mindfully everything that you are touching.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Distress Tolerance Skills-Distract

These are skills for putting up with painful events and feelings when you cannot make things better right away:

The first of these is DISTRACT (Take your attention off of your worries/feelings) with:  "Wise Mind ACCEPTS"

ACCEPTS is an acronym for

Activities
Contributing
Comparisons
Emotions
Pushing Away
Thoughts
Sensations

Activities= getting active; doing something
 Exercise or work on a hobby; clean your home; call or visit a friend; go to work and be "one-mindful" when there; play sports; go out to eat; do gardening; play video games

Contributing= doing something for someone else
Do volunteer work; give something to someone else; make something for someone else; do something thoughtful or surprising for someone else
 
Comparisons= putting yourself next to others (in your mind) and looking at how they are dealing with things; thinking about others who are "worse off" than you


Emotions= Feelings (Figure out what you are feeling, then do something to help you feel opposite that feeling)
Read books, watch movies or listen to music that makes you have strong feelings.  Be sure that what you do creates different feelings than the feelings you have right now which are causing you distress.  Ideas:  Scary movies, joke books, comedies, religious movies, or listening to marching songs
 
Pushing Away= Block the situation in your mind for awhile~Use with caution
Push the problem away by not thinking about it for awhile.  Build a pretend wall between you and the problem.  Push the problem away by blocking it in your mind.  Don't allow yourself to think about the problem over and over again (that's ruminating).  Put the problem causing the painful feelings on a shelf for awhile or box it up and store it away.  use with extreme caution, otherwise it could become avoiding which is not healthy or helpful.

Thoughts= Change what you are thinking about
Count to 10; count colors in a painting or tree; do puzzles; watch TV; read.
 
Sensations= Doing something to change one or more of the fives senses
Hold ice in hand and wait until it melts; squeeze a rubber ball very hard; stand under a very hard and very hot shower; listen to loud music; have sex; put a rubber band on your wrist, pull it out and then let it go.


Coming Soon....

I know that I have not been posting here as often as I should, and to be honest lately I have given more attention to my other blog which talks more about my faith.  However I want to get better about posting here to.

Over the next little bit I will post here some things I have learned from DBT, and different things that we have covered in the group I used to belong to.  I am still waiting to hear back from the other group.

I do not claim to be a professional and I don't claim to have mastered any of these skills.  I simply would like to share what I am learning.



Thursday, September 6, 2012

Failure in the world's eyes

I was sharing on a website some thoughts I had last night.  Because in the eyes of the world, I am a failure.  I am 33 living at home with my mom, can't keep a job, and nothing I do has any eternal value.  In fact nothing I do has any real value at all.  So then what is the point in living if nothing matters.

No I am not really depressed, and I am not suicidal.  Just questioning what I do in life that matters, and what has eternal value.

I talked to God about this last night, and well the only answer I received to all of this is that I have value because God loves me.  But I did not receive any ideas about what to do with my life, or job now.  I also didn't get answers to where I should serve.

But on this other website, it was recommended that since I do like to communicate in the written form, and I do struggle with Mental Illness, that I combine that with my faith, and write a devotional for the mentally ill.  But I'm not sure that my writing is good enough for that.

But the thought was that it would give me a greater purpose.  What do you think?

Friday, August 31, 2012

DBT Classes

Some of you may recall that I mentioned that I was having some problems with the DBT group that I was attending and how with the change of therapists that it was not a great fit for me.  Well I have recently left that group and am currently on the waiting list to attend another one.

But I decided that I really wanted to learn the skills and didn't want to risk not getting the chance to learn the skills.....so taking a long shot, I decided to look online...to try and find the skills.  I have actually found a group online where you are given notes every week and actually receive feedback on your homework assignments.

I would like to recommend for anyone else looking for the DBT skills, that you check out the Yahoo DBT Skills Class.


http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/dbtclass/?yguid=539494839

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Beginning a new therapeutic relationship

I apologize for not posting earlier.  I want to say that I met with my new therapist alone on Wednesday.  I have to admit that it went rather well.  I thought it was going to be another meeting with both therapists, but I was mistaken.  But talking with the new therapist....was kind of like talking to an old friend.  The conversation flowed well, and I wasn't concerned with trying to impress her, or get any specific expectations met.

I think that this is going to be a new good solid relationship, and a great help on my growth journey.  And I was impressed that I didn't feel badly because the old therapist was gone...because I know I will see her again.

I'm rather excited and looking forward to moving along on the journey towards wellness and recovery.  I am starting to notice the growth that I am making, and for me that is huge!!!!!!!

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

What I know and don't know

So I have been thinking about what it is I am supposed to be doing with my life now.  What job am I meant to pursue next?  I honestly don't know.  What are my dreams?  What do I want to do with the rest of my life?

But a few things I do know.   I know that I want to help others.  I also know that I am good at computers and customer service.

Where does that leave me in finding a job, I'm not sure.  But at least I know that I need to take these things into consideration while in my job search.

The things I don't know are what exactly I want to pursue or how I want to do it.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Blessed

I am so blessed.  Life has brought changes that I wasn't expecting and yes I originally struggled with that, but then it just made me realize that I am just so blessed.  God is leading me, where, I am not sure.  But I am not concerned about the problems and circumstances that I am looking at. I am just resting in knowing that God has everything under control, and I have no reason to worry.  I am so Blessed.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Trials

In light of current life changes....I think I have been coping fairly well.  And more and more change seems to be coming.  But at times it is simply so hard to keep moving forward, when everything in life seems to be falling apart. 

People's minds are messed up things, and they twist normal everyday stuff into you being out to get them, and then they try to create trouble for you.  Whatever, I may not know much, and I am constantly trying to deal with the ongoing drama of life, but I do know one thing.  MY GOD IS BIGGER THAN ANY THING THAT THEY CAN PUT IN MY PATH. 

My go to verse for now is Psalm 5:12:  For You, O Lord, will bless the righteous; With favor You will surround him as with a shield.

I have God's favor on my life, and no one can take that away from me.  As long as I remember that no one can cause me permanent damage.  God will fight the battle, and all I have to do, is simply to do what I can, and give it to God.

Thursday, July 12, 2012

Happiness

Lately I have been really struggling.  I'm not sure that I know what it takes to be happy.  I'm not even sure that I would know how to define happiness in my life.  I sometimes even wonder why I continue to try, when more often than not my days are a struggle to get through.

I know that people are happy and that happiness can be found.  But right now I am lacking that aspect of my life.  It's back to fight to get through each day, and hopefully find something in the day that is even remotely satisfying.

Wondering how to get to the happy that I see others have in life.  There must be something I am missing...I just don't know what that is yet.

Friday, June 22, 2012

Current Ramblings

Struggling lately.  Lots and lots of change taking place in my life all at one time.  I don't deal well with change.  Ever.  Losing my DBT therapist, my regular therapist is an intern that is leaving in August, personal situations that I need to change, and just lost my supervisor at work.

I've had to really work on trusting lately, trusting God and trusting myself to know what is best and how to proceed.  I've also had to work on distraction techniques, and not worrying myself sick over all the changes.

Then dodging office politics.....another sticky situation at best.

I'm getting more life lessons than I care to face at any one point in time.  But I can say that I haven't given up or quit....I am persevering and trying to use my skills to get through this, one slow painful step at a time.

Monday, June 4, 2012

Balance

So ...I've been thinking and there are some goals that I want to meet.  The most pressing I think is finding a work/life balance.  My part-time job is turning out to be more like full time and my energy has been so low that I am finding that having time for recreational activities and online activities is hard to do.

I need to get  back into church and make friends, and do some other things to balance the work stresses.

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